When I raise my trigger finga...

Would you like to hear about Ruidoso?  Yes?  Well...  friends.  Romans.  Lend me your eyes.

Let's just say it was a good fucking time.  Me and four of my closest friends left home for Ruidoso at around 2 am - very, very hung over.  We arrived at our cabin nine hours later.

And the fun began. 

We brought about an ounce and a half of some very, very good pot (some of which was smoked on the drive - dangerous, I know.) and shitload of energy.  Bought food, went out, had drinks...  but most importantly, we carved the shit out of the most snowless mountains I've been on. 

Seriously, the runs were ice.  On the first day one of my homies took a fat jump, landed it, went to hit another and got the nose of his board caught under a piece of ice at the top of the hop.  You can imagine what happened after.  Let's just say he didn't snowboard for three of the four days he paid for.  Oh, and - no refunds.

On to more important things than boarding - women.  Seriously, Ruidoso was packed with some very, very, very, very fine women.  Unfortunately, my injured friend dampened my ability to meet up with them by virtue of the fact that his pain kept him from going out.

"Why not go out without him," you might say.

Because I'm an idiot.

Anyway, I learned a lot about life in Ruidoso.  Most importantly, snow is cold.

But hey.  I'm back.  And I know you've missed me.

<3

Out o' Town

Back on the 26th.  More mountains to carve.

Much love  <3.

The Blower's Daughter

I'm sure several of you have already heard this jam, but if you haven't - consider this a recommendation.

Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ThuXEDvCZk

Perks to working behind the bar

Include, but are not limited to:

• Free drinks
• Sexy girls
  
• Being able to give sexy girls free drinks
• Those drinks being truly free
• Watching drunk couples in love
• Watching drunk couples fight
• Watching drunk people trying to attract mates by following their most basic of instincts - blah blah blah blah "let's take this outside!" stumble stumble

And stories like this:

Customer:  "I need four shots of tequila!"
Me: "Sorry sir, bars are all closed.  I can't get ya any alcohol."

Customer: [Nods assent, looks down - looks back up] "Okay...  THREE shots of tequila."
Me:  "Sorry.  Bars are closed."

Customer: [Nods head (rather vigorously this time) - looks back up] "All right.. three tequilas!"
Me:  "Dude.  Bar.  Closed.  Want water?"

[Five minute pause as I clean my bar]

Customer: "You gonna get me those fucking tequilas?!?"
Me:  "Are you fucking kidding me?  WE'RE CLOSED!"

So Tahoe..

...was a blastaroni sandwich.

Seriously.  My buddy's family was super fucking cool - his dad paid for every meal, room - all I paid was for my lift tickets.  I really appreciated that given the circumstances.  Won't lie - buddy's sister is stunning.  Independent, intelligent - has different views but doesn't force them on anyone.  That's so sexy to me it's not even funny.  A week around her was great. 

Hitting the slopes was awesome.  Hitting literally, of course.  I landed on my ass so nasty that after the first day I was miserable.  Second day came, though, and all was well.

Here's to Riodusa next weekend.

So get this...

I got laid off, right?

So I registered for school full-time++ (21 credit hours).

Because of this I may be denied unemployment benefits.

I know people who did nothing for six months while receiving benefits (who, coincidentally, were fired for misconduct - which means they should have automatically been ineligible for UI benefits.  They were asked absolutely no questions.  I know because I lived with 'em.)

If I don't receive benefits I will not pay a dime in Federal Tax that hasn't already been paid.  Nor will I pay next year - nor the year after.  If I don't get these benefits I'll lose everything.  If the government lets that happen (Federal or State) they can go fuck themselves.

"But UI benefits are a state issue, Parad0x."  Yes, but my state doesn't have a state income tax - so Fed is the only way to go.  Plus, the fed provides funding for UI so either way...

Man, I'm so pissed.  I lose a great job and try to better myself (on my OWN dime - the semester started 4 days before my layoff, so the state won't pay for any of this semester) and I get fucked.

Brilliant.

So I started at a bar...

...and it's a blasty blast.  Don't get it twisted, I'm not a cool kid yet - just a bar back.  But when it comes to tipout at the end of the night I do just fucking fine. 

Actually, it's really a good time.  I bust my fucking asssssss but I get to flirt with pretty girls all night long and I get a few numbers at the end of the night (okay, just last night - don't get carried away).

I have a feeling I have a better opportunity to bartend than a lot of the other dudes there.  We had a grueling, hour-long boring meeting where (at the end) the boss told everyone how "chill" I am and how I "have that look and that vibe."  That look and that vibe that brings the ladies in?  Cool.  Gimme a bar.

I'll be honest though - I've never been this sore in my life.  On my feet for 9 hours straight (yeah, we don't get out of there til 5 fucking a fucking em) and it's a killer.  Much different than the desk job I had two weeks ago where I sat on my ass hating myself.  I will say I've lost some weight already - probably a little to do with the improved diet and going back to the gym.  I'm surprised I haven't succumbed to the temptation to drink behind the bar each night - talk about something that'll ruin my "diet."

Anyway, Tahoe is three days away (four including today) and then Ruidosa Febr'ary 21-25.  Some might say I'm psyched.  Others might say I'm jazzed.  Whatev.  Bring on the fucking powder!

Bonus points if you count how many times I used the word "fuck" - regardless of the tense.